And the "Most Original Award Goes Too......"

Each year I am overwhelmed but the heartfelt thanks you's, homemade Christmas Cards and lots and lots of cookies and chocolate given as wonderful gifts before the holiday break. I always appreciate them all and know that I am truly fortunate to receive them.

This year, I received a very exciting and unique gift that I can honestly say has never crossed my desk before. I cannot wait to fire up the BBQ and use my new 25% Less Sodium Seasoning Spice from The Keg!!! (I'm not sure if they know that I do enjoy a good steak once and a while, of it they are hinting at the fact that I may look bloated and am retaining water due to my high levels of salt intake?)

Regardless, I am ever appreciative and will likely go to sleep with visions of T-Bones dancing in my head!

Merry Christmas Everyone! :)

Cute Comment of the Day...

After singing Christmas Songs, I asked a grade 1 class today what the students are doing over the holiday break.

Cute little Sally raised her hand and replied:

"My dad rented an anaconda for us to stay in, in the desert!"

Translation: They are renting a condo in Arizona.

Too cute!

Technology Rant...

I'm wondering....since when does a Grade 3 student need a cell phone 'in case of emergencies?" That's the response I received from Billy in class the other day when I asked him what he had in his hands.

He's 8 years old!!!??!!

(Ranting complete)

And the Teacher of the Year Award goes to....

Grade 1 Billy: "Mrs. M, I found your class boring today."

Me (thinking I had a pretty fun and active lesson planned). "I'm sorry to hear you feel that way."

Billy: "It's okay - I still did what you asked us to do!"

Me: "Thank you Billy." (insert tear here)

Quote of the Week

When reviewing 'dynamics' with a Grade 2 class, Billy answers:

"Dynamics is when you die when you hear the music!"

Diggin' for Gold!

I'm not sure if it's because of the increase in dry air pressure, or perhaps it's an age-old pass-time that I'm just noticing more and more....but I am CONSTANTLY watching kids pick their noses!

Now that I'm more aware of it, I'm seeing it everywhere and it's really grossing me out.

The funny thing is, the students don't really seem to notice each other digging away! Or maybe they are just choosing to ignore their friends knuckle-deep in their nasal cavity.

I don't want to embarrass them by centering them out, but my classes all share and touch the same instruments, and I really don't want the passing of booger juice between my students. I have quietly been asking them to stop...but it's getting to be a bit much!

In the last couple of days alone, I've asked at least half a dozen kids in different classes to wash their hands in the middle of class before touching an instrument again. They all oblige without issue, but some even go right back to picking!

Maybe it's the colder, dryer weather? Maybe they're bored? Maybe their hungry? (so gross!) I don't know what it is, but PLEASE stop picking - I have LOTS of kleenex!

Gotta Love their Vocabulary!

As part of a Grade 1 lesson today, I read a story that students will be adding instrument accompaniment to. The students had fun singing along to 'Mortimer' by Robert Munsch and brainstorming which sounds we should use in the story.

At the end of it, I asked how the the students liked the book.

The best response:

5 year old Billy: I loved it, but you forgot to tell us who the illustrator was - they're important too!

(Gotta love 5 year olds! - And yes, illustrators ARE important...shame on me!) :)

Conversation of the Day....

Grade 4 Sally: "Mrs. M, how old are you?"

Me: "89" (the answer I always give)

Sally: "My grandma's 89, you look a BIT younger than that"

Me: "It must be the Oil of Olay I use"

Sally: "Hmm....It works!"

You know it's Report Card season when....

....you're so tired that you're already looking forward to the glorious Daylight Savings Time extra hour of sleep! (Nov 7th!)

Was there a full moon last night?

Honestly! I have no idea what happened over the weekend. Almost all of my classes returned to school today a little 'off'. Maybe the glorious 'honeymoon' phase of September is now over, or perhaps Halloween candy is already starting to be consumed. I don't know....but WOW, what a day!

I think I'm going to try for a 20 minute power nap to get me through the rest of the evening and the looming report cards!

Tomorrow is a new day and I'm hoping a little less of a nutty one!

To Blink or Not to Blink.....

I had the unique oppotunity of teaching a Kindergarten class last week (I've never taught the wee ones before). A class I was supposed to have was on a field trip, so I covered that teacher's class for the period - Kindergarten! They're so cute and small and sweet, the last thing I wanted to do was bring one to tears.

We were singing a song that involves moving, singing and suddenly freezing on the spot. I was explaining what a 'freeze pose' looks like - "Your body is still, you don't move a muscle, you don't even blink! (I explained).

We started the song, the kids moving around and singing while I was playing the piano. After I few rounds, I notice a little guy standing there in the middle of the room bawling. I didn't even know his name (it's the first time we had met) but I quickly asked him what was wrong.

Through sobbing tears, he says "I just want to blink!!" The poor little guy thought he wasn't allowed to even blink during the 'freeze' part of the song. I quickly apologized (realizing that my instructions were taken literally) and said he could blink as much as he wanted.

After teaching Intermediate students for years, I must remember to be VERY careful in my choice of words with the young ones.

Now allowed to blink, Billy was much happier and continued singing with us with his lubricated eyeballs! :)

Quote of the Day...

Grade 1: (during circle time today) "Mrs. M - you have a neck" (touches my neck). "I have a neck too!" (touches his own neck, while smiling at his revelation).

Excuse of the Day...

When talking with a colleague, she told me of a recent conversation she had with a parent of a very young student who has recently been kicking, punching and choking other students.

The parent's response: "My child has a 'strength gene'. He's stronger than he realizes - that's why he hurts others."

Priceless!

Germs, Germs, Germs...

Unfortunately "Pie in the Face Friday" (chocolate cream!) didn't keep the doctor away, as now I'm quite sick.

One of the 'job hazards' of teaching 17 different classes a week is the exposure to the lovely germs that walk through the door. Despite washing my hands after almost every class, I seem to get sick every six weeks or so.

So, on this Thanksgiving Day I will look for the silver lining and be thankful for a lovely day yesterday with my family, and a day to rest and recuperate today to overcome this cough.

Happy Thanksgiving (and take some vitamins!)

ATTENTION! (Also known as "The Case of the Mysterious Salute")

I'm not sure if there's a joke being played on me, or if I've all of a sudden turned into a scary dictator, but for some reason a few students (all boys, of different grades) have been standing at attention and saluting when I'm around.

Evidence:

Weird Salute #1: Yesterday, a cheeky Grade 2 boy saluted and yelled out "YES SIR!" after I gave the class instructions to tidy up. (Note: this did NOT go over well, and we hat a nice little chat after school).

Weird Salute #2: Also yesterday, when doing attendance in a different class, a Grade 3 boy stood up and saluted "Here" and sat back down.

Weird Salute #3: As I walked down the hall today, a grade 6 boy stopped what he was doing and stood at attention, hand in salute position at his temple.

Fact: None of these boys are friends, nor are they in the same grade.

Question: Is the salute the new "Hi" when encountering someone you know?

I'll keep you posted on this unsolved mystery.....

Quote of the Day....

A Grade 2 Billy returned to my room today, minutes after his class left, proclaiming he forgot his 'sushi'. He marched in the class, picked up his jacket from the shelf and left.

Apparently he refers to his coat as his 'sushi'. I met his teacher in the hall after school and she said he's been calling his jacket that all year!

Oh, the imagination!

A Pie in the Face a Day keeps the Doctor Away....

....or something like that, right?

This coming Friday, I will be receiving a pie-in-the-face and I'm really looking forward to it!

Our school (like many others) participated in the Terry Fox run last week. As an incentive to raise over $5000, some teachers volunteered to take students out for lunch, be made over for the day at the hands of a top-earner, bake kids their favourite cookies, be duct-taped to the wall and receive a pie in the face.

The students rose to the occasion and raised over $7000 for an amazing cause!! I will proudly accept my fate on Friday!

(I hope it's Lemon Meringue!)

What did you say? I can't hear you!

Picture it, today, a Grade 2 Billy, sitting and listening oh-so-attentively, and I noticed something odd about his ears. He had folded down and tucked the tops of both of his ears inside the hole of his ears - and they stayed there! We was working away as if all was normal and he DIDN'T have his ears tucked into his head! I asked him why he did that. His response: "It's comfortable!" (obviously!?!)

None of the other kids seemed to notice, or care and of course, as soon as they left the class, I HAD to see if I could do it to my own ears .... I can't. It actually almost seems physically impossible to do it! Can you???

Question of the Day...

Grade 1 Billy: Can I get a drink to wash out my throat?

(How cute is that?)

OMOTD (Ow Moment of the Day!)

I got a lovely 'Grade 3 shoulder slam' up my chin this afternoon, throwing my whole head back. It was a total accident - but I couldn't help but by yelp out in pain. I think the poor guy felt worse than I did about it. Note to self: Watch out for those sharp shoulders on Billy when teaching him how to properly hold glockenspiel mallets!

Juice Bag - Full Circle Moment

Not too long ago, I experienced a 'full circle' moment after the whole 'Juice Bag' incident.

A lovely parent in my school came up to me with a fund raising idea. She was going to make and sell purses and wallets to students and families in the school and donate all of the proceeds to my program. What a generous and thoughtful thing to do! I instantly bought one and have purchased a few for other people as well.

Can you guess what her #1 material used in her purses is? Yup - juice bags!! (Kool Aid Jammers to be specific!)

I can't help but smile when I use it! :)

Quote of the Day....

Sally: "Mrs. M., your hair this morning was really nice and curly and now it's really flat."

Me: Yes it is Sally, thank you.

Parents: The Good, The Bad, and The Awesome!

For every student I teach, there is at least one adult responsible for them. I've met a lot parents over the years; many wonderful caregivers who have their child's best interests at heart. Others.....well.....let's just say I've met some VERY interesting folks:


The Helicoter Parent: The parent that 'hovers' above their child, afraid to let go, calling me up to four times a day for advice, reassurance, or to just tell me 'one more thing'.

The BFF Parent: Those who share clothes with their kids (including their midriff-baring tank tops), gossip about the other students with them, and take them to to the spa for the day when their child was suspended for being violent in school. (True story!)

The Orchard Syndrome Parent: Where the apple doesn't far fall from the tree. (Enough said!)

The 'Refuse to Grow Up' Parent: Voicemail msg: Beats, Beats, Beats, Dance music, BEATS, BEATS - (in a seductive voice purring into the phone) "You've reached Billy's mom, leave a message and I'll call you back.....purrrr!"

The 'In Denial' Parent: When sitting down in a meeting with the principal, the parents and the student who told me to "F-Off!" at recess, the parent asks which direction his child was facing when he swore, as he may have been swearing INTO THE WIND!

The Sigmund Freud: When parent/teacher interview night turns into a therapy session about their failed marriage and their cheating ex-husband's new girlfriend. (Very awkward)

The Awesome Parent!: The supportive, caring, nurturing, helpful parent that only wants their children to try their best and be all they can be. Thankfully, there are more of these out there than the above! :)

Quote of the Day...

Today, while picking up a Grade 2 class from their recess door, Billy* and I had this lovely conversation:

Billy (while grabbing his behind): "Mrs. M, I keep getting wedgies!"

Me: "Well Billy, you got a lot taller over the summer. Maybe you new to get some new pants because you're growing so quickly."

Billy: "No, I think it's because I didn't wipe my bum the last time I went to the bathroom, can I go fix it?"

Me: "Yes Billy, Go!"

*Yes, this Billy happens to be the SAME Billy as the 'Pants in the Toilet' and "Juice Bag' student!!!

When making a list, be sure to check it twice!

I was thinking today about a pretty embarrassing situation I put myself in last fall, just about a month after teaching in a brand new BIG school.

I had assigned a major assignment to all of our Intermediate students and was up to my eyeballs in marking. (Note to self, don't assign a major project to 120 students with the exact same due date). I thought I was starting to see double when I picked up a second assignment in the same class that looked and sounded pretty similar to another I had already read. I dug through the growing pile and found the other one. Not only was it a similar assignment, it was EXACTLY THE SAME. Same font, same format, same spelling mistakes, word for word, except for the name on the top of it.

I've come across plagiarism before, even minor cheating ... but never full out ripping off of somebody's work. I talked to both of the girls in question and they fully admitted to cheating, one doing all of the work, the other convincing her 'friend' to let her full out copy her. Both of the girls had to each do a separate and new assignment and knew that I would be calling home.

I wrote a note to remind myself to call their parents that evening. Another matter came up after school which led me putting off calling home until the following morning. I called the first set of parents, told them the story (was surprised how they weren't really put off by the whole thing and didn't seem fazed that their daughter cheated....more about parents in another posting). I called (who I thought was the other girl) and got her father on the phone. I went through the whole story again and he was totally and utteruly shocked. He was appalled and started screaming for his daughter to come to him (while still on the phone with me). She started denying the whole thing to him and he and she were yelling back and forth. It wasn't until she screamed out that she didn't copy off the girls project, that it was 'Sally' that did, did I realize that I called the WRONG STUDENT'S HOUSE!

You see, the girl that I had just called had a VERY similar name to the cheater that confessed the day before. Being new to the school, and teaching 17 different classes a week, was a bad combo and made for an easy mix up.

I started stuttering and apologizing profusely to the VERY upset father on the phone. Although he couldn't see me, I was definitely the colour 'Embarrased' from the crayon box. I couldn't believe I wrote down and contacted the wrong student's parents.

As this all happened before school, I went to meet the girl outside before the morning bell went and apologized again and again, and followed up with an apology letter home to her parents. I have never felt so badly and was kicking myself for making such a dumb mistake.

Moral of the story: Like Santa, I've definitely learned to check all of my names twice, after making a list!

Mrs. M's 'Back to School Top Six List'

Top Six Quotes Heard During the First Week Back At School

6. "My mom made a baby!"

5. "Mrs. M., You Got New Hair!"

4. During a song/game called "I've got a loose tooth" a grade 2 student
announces "Mrs. M, I lost my tooth!"(while holding his tooth in the air).
What are the odds that he loses his tooth while singing a song about loosing
your teeth???

3. (Pointing to my wedding ring). "Is that real?" (Me) "Yes Billy, it's real".
(Billy) "Pshht, my dad owns a jewellery store, he has rings THIS big!!"
(makes gestures similar to the size of a boulder!)

2. (During an activity, a grade three boy yells out loud) "Boys are GAY, girls
are HOT!" (Where the heck did that one come from ????)

And my personal fav.....

1. First day of school, a grade three student has apparently had a very rough
day. He comes to my class late after having to stay back to talk to his
teacher about his behaviour. He slams open the door and yells as he's
entering.... "DID I MISS ANYTHING GOOD? I BETCHA I DIDN'T!!

Kids definitely say the darndest things!

Happy New Year!

I've never not been in school. (I know, I know, grammar check needed!)

From elementary school, through high school, university, teacher's college and now into my sixth year of teaching, I've always experienced the excitement of early September and school approaching, even more so than the actual new year anticipation in January.

September has always been a time of 'new beginnings' for me. New classes of study or new classes to teach. The air is crisp and alive (except for today), a few new items of clothing are purchased (not to mention the countless new school supplies!), goals are set, re-connections with colleagues are made and the count down resumes until the big day.... the first day of school.

SO, although almost three months earlier than the calendar says.... HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! May 2010/2011 be a great one!

My new (school) year's resolution for 2010/2011 is to try not to lose my work keys on a weekly basis!

M.

P.S. (Is it bedtime yet? I'm wiped!)

The Official 'Juice Bag' Story

WARNING: The following posting contains mildly offensive language. Reader discretion is advised...

I decided to name this blog after one of the funniest (and frustrating) moments from last year. I have told this story to many family and friends, some of whom encouraged me to write it down so I wouldn't forget it....hence this birth of this blog.

It all began during an activity some Grade 2 students were doing last year. Part of the activity involved having the students draw a picture of what they thought of, when listening to a particular song. One Grade 2 lad was colouring away, when he stopped, looked proudly at the man he just drew and proclaimed 'This guy is such a douche bag!", and then continued to draw.

The student-teacher in my room and I looked up and gave each other the 'Did I just hear that?, eyes'. I went closer to the student and asked him what he said. He repeated that his man was such a douche bag (confirming what I heard). I asked him what he thought that meant. He said, "You know, like a cool dude!" (Whew) Oh, ok - just a misunderstanding - great news! I told him that he indeed did draw a 'cool dude' and that that other word he said didn't really exist (a blatant teacher-lie on my part - but hey, this kid is 7).

Fast forward a couple of weeks. Unbeknownst to me, 'douche bag' was spreading like wildfire through the primary classes. A colleague of mine was away sick one day, when her supply teacher dropped off her Grade 1 class to my room. A normally difficult class, the kids must have had a field day with this poor guy - as they entered the room screaming and yelling, and he was gone, running down the hall faster than Usain Bolt, leaving no explanation for the chaos.

In they came, and right away one little guy starts screaming and pointing to Billy (the same 'I washed my clothes in the toilet' Billy from a few postings ago) accusing him of calling him a douche bag. Tears are flying and of course Billy is denying the whole thing. My lesson plan flies out the window at this point, and we all sit down for a class discussion of these 'not very nice words'. Apparently, in the last few weeks, the true meaning of 'le douche' had surfaced and was explained to me in full detail by the entire grade 1 class (and yes, they were on the right track!)

I went on to tell the entire class that calling someone a Douche Bag is not a nice thing to do - as those words are hurtful and shouldn't be used in school. I also said that I definitely did not want to hear those words again in my class.

All in agreement, we started the class. All was well for about four minutes before I heard "Mrs. M., Mrs. M., Billy called me a douche bag again!!!" being screamed from across the room. Followed by even louder howls of "I DID NOT CALL YOU A DOUCHE BAG......I CALLED YOU A FOOSH BAG" from Billy. So, I then proceed to talk to the class about how it isn't polite to call someone words that even RHYME with douche bag and (with me slowly starting to lose it) said that if I heard any more nonsense about it, they would have to talk to me about it at recess ( a punishment comparable to torture for Grade 1 students - they LOVE recess!)

By this time, there are only minutes left until the end of class, and I have come to terms that today's lesson was a total flop. Billy remains fairly well behaved for those last few moments, and no other rumblings of Douche Bags or Foosh Bags can be heard.

At the end of class, the group is lined up ready to go, when their supply teacher arrives to pick them up. On the way out, in the quietest voice ever, I see and hear Billy leave his spot in line, find his 'victim' again and mutter under his breath as they left the room 'YOU JUICE BAG!".

I didn't know whether to laugh out loud hysterically or cry in frustration. I decided to laugh, (once they had all left) and realized that I was totally out-smarted by this 7 year old. He 'waited' until he was out of my room to give the final zinger, knowing he'd get in trouble if he said it again in my class!

This story does continue, as there was follow-through concerning his language/behaviour (as apparently, it wasn't happening just in my room) but I won't go into details about that - as it's definitely not as entertaining as the story itself.

I couldn't have thought of a more ridiculous name for a blog about (hopefully and somewhat) entertaining teacher-tales!

M.

P.S. The 'Douche Bag', 'Foosh Bag' and 'Juice Bag' terms have fortunately 'retired' from the vocabulary of the little ones at our school......for the time being! :)

Would you like fries with that?

I was filling up my tank with gas the other night, and I looked up to see three pre-teen boys mooning me from the McDonald's located right beside the gas station I was at. I pretended that I didn't see them as I'm sure they were waiting to laugh at my embarrassed reaction. Oh, the things you don't expect to see at 9:30 on a Wednesday night!

This 'event' reminded me of another McDonald's-related story that happened a few years back at my old school.

A colleague friend of mine at school was teaching Grade 2 at the time. She had a young guy in her class who was a runner. Now, I don't mean in the 'I'm training for the Olympics when I grow up' way....but more of an, 'I'm often going to run away and hide from the teacher because I want to' kind of way.

One day she was leading her group outside for an outdoor gym-class, when 'Billy' (who was somewhere in the middle of the line heading out the doors) made a bee-line away from the rest of the class. By the time his classmates told my colleague that he was running, (literally less than a minute later) he was LONG gone.

She ran around the perimeter of the school looking for him, without luck. She contacted the principal and the office staff immediately and so began the school-wide search for 'Billy'. Every classroom, washroom and closet was checked, thinking he may have hid. When Billy didn't turn up, they called his mother and then the police.

Frantic, his mom jumped in her car and started making her way towards the school. En route, she saw her son leisurely walking back towards the school, eating a happy meal. She screeched to a halt, put him in the car and brought him back to our building.

In short, 'Billy' ran from his gym class, down the street to McDonald's, 1.3km away from our school!! He walked in and ordered a Happy Meal, casually mentioning that he forgot to bring his credit card with him (remember, he's in Grade 2). They thought he was so funny/sweet that they gave him the meal anyway and didn't think of questioning where his family was.

The teacher, principal, parent and police were glad he was safe and sound, however a safety plan was put in place for his fleeting ways.

So again, I ask, "Would you like fries with that?" and ponder if I could get a free happy meal by just saying I forgot my credit card?

M.

I, Mrs. M., take thee, School Supplies, as my lawfully wedded.....

IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR! Hearing this annual Staples commercial is truly music to my ears.

You see, I have a bit of a problem, infatuation, love/hate love relationship with school supplies. (The first step of recovery is admission, so here I go).

This 'problem' of mine dates way back to my childhood (as most do). A friend of mine and I started collecting pens in grade school. We literally collected dozens and dozens and brought them to school in massive pencil cases every day. She found out through her aunt that if we wrote to Bic Canada and gave them suggestions for new pen designs, they would write us back and include sample packages of their latest product. So we did that - many times. There was nothing quite like receiving a nice large package in the mail full of beautiful new writing utensils.

My obsession grew. I used to LOVE going to Grand & Toy. Grand & Toy 15 years ago is VERY different than G&T today. Back then (in the good ol' days) all of the pens and pencils were sold loose, allowing you to test them out before purchasing them!!! I used to love carefully choosing and trying out new purchases quite often.

Despite the fact that I owned so many, I always knew exactly how many I would have in any given pen holder or pencil case at any given time. To the point that my poor sister or mom would come and 'borrow' one from my room, and by the end of the day, I'd be asking everyone in the house who 'stole' my pens.

My love of writing utensils has now grown to include markers (Go Sharpies!), Post-it-Notes (super-sticky are the best!) and stickers (just found out that there is a Sandylion Sticker Warehouse in Markham!). My desk at school is all ready to go for next week with a plethora of brand new markers, a variety of sticky notes (thanks again sister for the Korean post-it notes of bears doing yoga!) and stickers galore. (I swear I teach because of the kids, not because of my problem!)

Each year I look forward to perusing the aisles of Staples (of course I have a membership!), Costco (great deals in bulk!), Walmart and the teacher's holy grail of stores, Dollerama (insert angels singing here) to fulfill my back-to-school-addiction (BTSA for short).

Finally, I am proud to say that I showed MASSIVE restraint the other day when picking up some "essential" 'That Was Easy' Staples buttons for an upcoming function, I forced myself to put down the amazingly priced, beautiful, clear bucket of 50 pens for only $7.00!!! (Although, I am still thinking about them).

So now that I've admitted that I am 100% certifiably crazy, I ask .... does anyone out there relate? Anyone? Bueller? :)

M.

What doesn't kill you .....

..... makes you stronger, right?

I’ll never forget my first year of teaching (does anyone?) Fresh out of teacher's college, I was very fortunate to get a job quickly and I walked into my new school brimming with enthusiasm and had my 'bag of tricks' filled with ideas of community building and bonding with my 'dream team' class.

My first hint that I may have been in over my head was when the first thing my grade-partner told me was not to smile until Christmas. Laughing off his not so subtle advice, I entered into what was hands down the most challenging class I've taught to date.

Nightly episodes of Gilmour Girls and a glass of 'milk' (on the rocks) helped get me through that year with a class stacked with behaviour issues, not to mention some of the most atrocious stories of home lives that I've heard of. Now don't get me wrong, I know my inexperience in teaching in general (not to mention never dealing with so many varying learning abilities and emotional backgrounds) was a large contributing factor to that challenging year.

Somehow - the end of the year arrived, and I was still in one piece (although I don't think I've ever since been so happy to hear the final bell go on the last day of school since!)

Here are a few 'highlights' that I still recall from that first year.....

- having a brand new Mac laptop stolen from my room on one of the few days I was away that year (and no, they never found it).

- getting a call from my principal on a Sunday night saying that our school was broken into and that a number of my drum skins were slashed and all of my windows were broken (not to mention the fire extinguisher that was set off - leaving dust that was still found in my classroom years later - that stuff is CRAZY to clean!)

- being called a racist because I asked a student to stay back to properly fill out his homework agenda

- seeing a student projectile vomit THROUGH his clarinet and onto the carpet

- having a student toss his saxophone across the room - IN THE AIR!!

- splitting my pants (yes black pants while wearing pink underwear) after missing the step down when hanging artwork from my ceiling, in front of the whole class. (Note to self: I need to re-watch my Ladder Safety Video - "Slips, Trips and Falls', an Oscar-worthy performance!)

- absolutely losing it on a student after repeatedly asking him not to throw spitballs into the girl's hair sitting in front of him. I actually 100% lost my cool on him, yelling out a few not so nice teacher words.....and subsequently called his mother to apologize, after apologizing to him profusely as well. (Apparently, according to his mom, his last teacher called him A LOT worse! Regardless, I shouldn't have lost my cool on the kid - but I was driven to the edge that day - and it hasn't happened again since)

- having an intoxicated parent march into our classroom, unannounced, yelling and screaming about how the public school system has failed her daughter.


..... and while I'm on a role, here are a few other memorable moments over the years.....

- having a Grade 3 student 'fist pump' both middle fingers at me through the window after being sent in the hall to cool down after throwing his recorder at another child's face.

- Grade 1 "Billy' returning to class after using the washroom, soaking wet and naked (except for his underwear) explaining that he didn't want to get in trouble at home for getting his clothes dirty at recess, so he decided to wash them in the toilet (he didn't consider the whole drying aspect of his plan - poor little guy!)

- and finally, one of my favourite....while teaching (what I thought to be a well planned and engaging lesson) this past year, a Grade 3 Billy starts yelling out, in the middle of the lesson, "BORING, BORING, YOU ARE SO BORING!!!, followed by a complete meltdown (he was definitely having a bad day).


Despite all of my ranting reflections here, while thinking back on all of these 'memorable' moments, I can honestly say that that the good days (which I will definitely touch more upon in the future) truly outweigh the bad. The days that I laugh until I hurt and smile FAR outweigh the days that have brought me to tears. From a little guy saying "You smell good today Mrs. M.......like oatmeal!" to seeing a struggling student 'shine' when they finally 'get it', to receiving handmade thank you cards accompanied with a smile, reminds me that all of the 'hard stuff' is totally worth it, and it all has definitely made me stronger!

M.

T-Minus 7 Days!

Hello!

Allow me to introduce myself!   I am Mrs. M., an elementary school teacher entering my sixth year of an incredible profession.   As August is winding down, the annual 'back-to-school anxiety dreams' have settled in nicely, visions of professional development workshops I've taken this summer are dancing in my head and I find myself busy preparing for another year and reflecting back on past memorable experiences.

Over the years, I have often shared hilarious and memorable stories from school with my family and friends and very often find myself saying 'I should write this one down so I won't forget it!'.   Many years, many students and many tales have come and gone and with back to school prep filling my brain, I thought I'd join the blogging world and share some with the magical world of the internet.

[Side Note: As to not exploit or embarrass any students, I will always refer to the lovely people who keep me loving my job as Billy and Sally.  These are names I often use in class when giving examples, as I've never actually taught a 'Billy' or a 'Sally'.]

As another school year commences, (7 more sleeps!) I plan to share entertaining, touching, funny, occasionally frustrating and hopefully inspiring tales from my past and current experiences in what I consider one of the most rewarding jobs in the world!

Thanks for reading..... now back to figuring out how to use my new label maker! :)

M.